Y’all. If this hasn’t been the craziest week, then I don’t know what is.
Like…. I wish I could tell you of ALL THE CRAZINESS that happened at work. Because y’all would just not be able to handle it.
But alas, that would get me fired in a jiffy and I quite love my crazy job.
This week the weather has turned to part fall, part winter. We have broken out the winter coats for the girls and they are like me and love a good coat.
People, including myself, just can’t help themselves. They keep saying “Look at those Little Red Riding Hoods!” etc etc.
Apparently Rory had enough of it because she said, “Momma! Who this Hood everyone talkin’ about?!” As in- who is this Hood person?! SHE JUST DOESN’T UNDERSTAND WHY THEY ARE CALLING HER THE WRONG NAME! Man, that has gotten me all kinds of tickled this week.
And there are other things SERIOUSLY BOTHERING Rory.
This past week I was trying to get them into the car because, as per usual, we were running late. (Why is it that we wake up at 5 O’CLOCK IN THE MOANIN’ but we are always always always running behind?!)
So I’m just a snappin’ away saying, “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!”.
Rory stops, puts her hand in the air and says, “Momma. I hate the snap.”
And right then and there it was like the end of your life when you flash through all your memories….
except I was just flashing through all the times I snap.
AND IT IS OBNOXIOUS.
I snap to get their attention when they are doing something they aren’t supposed to.
I snap when I’m getting onto them about pretty much anything, actually.
I snap when they are about to plunge to their death doing something only toddlers and drunk people are stupid enough to try. LIKE JUMPING OFF THEIR DRESSER ONTO THE BED. Oh yes, that happened this week.
I snap when I’m trying to hurry them along.
It hit me hard, ya’ll.
I’m going to be paying for MANY therapy sessions because of THE SNAP.
Bless her heart.
She cringes at the sound of the snap as bad as I do at the sound of the dryer buzzer.
THANKS A LOT, MOM.
Yesterday the girls’ school had their annual Thanksgiving lunch.
I had no idea how big of a deal it was! There were so many people. SO MANY.
Rory discovered cranberry sauce and the kid fell in love.
First she attempted to eat it with a spoon and thought, nah that is no fun.
Then she started sucking it up with a straw. Sadly, it was too thick to get it all up.
So she decided to take the little cups of it and shoot it back like a jello shot.
PROUD MOM MOMENT.
I swear, she looked like a professional at it. It was as though she had seen a jello shot before. And I assure you, there have been no jello shots in my house.
So everyone is looking on in horror and I’m just laughing because NOTHING SURPRISES ME ANYMORE.
But in all seriousness, I loved getting to eat with my girls. They were as crazy as ever, but I love this age where we can do things like this. And I’m just so thankful for my job because they let me leave for things like this.
I have one more fairly huge breaking news for y’all.
Yesterday morning the girls SLEPT IN (like six o’clock!) and I got completely ready and was starting to worry about Rory being okay. So I go to check on her (I mean, really… she never sleeps past six) and she wasn’t in her room.
I go into the living room and there she is, all snuggled on the couch with a pop tart watching cartoons.
I asked her how long she had been in there and she said, “Oh, I’ve been watching two shows, Mom.”
Like GAH NO BIG DEAL MOM.
I asked her how she got the pop tart and the TV on and she says…
WHILE ROLLING HER EYES BECAUSE I EXHAUST HER SO MUCH
“Mom. I turned it on and climbed up and got the pop tart and I’m just snugglin’.”
THANK YOU JESUS.
That is sincere.
THANK YOU JESUS. She didn’t wake up the whole house and she took care of herself and I was able to get completely ready.
I MEAN FOR REAL, Y’ALL- THIS IS A NEW ERA.
Please, Lord, let it stick.
I could, GASP, possibly sleep until 7 on Saturdays if she would keep this up!
Enter tears of joy over the thought.
HAPPY FRIDAY, Y’ALL!