Everyday Life, hilarious adventures

desperate times call for desperate measures.

As you all know by now, potty training is the bane of my existence.

No really.

Loathe it.

Ryder FINALLY got the hang of peeing on the potty. Girlfriend will wear those cute panties and rocks it. Goes on her own without me even reminding her. It is super amazing.


or butt.

She would not for the life of her poop on that potty.

In fact, I would put a pull up on her during nap and she would poop in her pull up instead of napping.

It was making me insane.


But I kept at it just praying that it would someday all come together.

Yesterday I tried a new tactic. I told Ryder that if and when she pooped on the potty she would get a…


Oh yes I did.

Her eyes lit up! She told me all about what kind of cake she wanted. I went along and said she could have ANY CAKE SHE WANTED.

Incidentally she decided on an A-Hole cake. Which is ironic and hilarious.

And by A-Hole I clearly mean Ariel. You know Ryder and her potty mouth.

So much like her mom already.

About ten minutes later I saw Ryder get up and go into the bathroom.


Next thing I know I hear a tiny grunt and then…..


We danced. We sang. We …. er….. I cried from shear joy.

Rory was even so excited she went and got money out of her OWN PIGGY BANK and gave it to Ryder. (Which incidentally made me cry tears of pride because that Rory girl has a HEART OF GOLD.)

We called pretty much every relative ever and made them cheer for the poop whether they liked it or not.

I texted every single friend that has young children. (Might I note that some  friends who are also in the throws of potty training *ahem Alexis* were quite hostile in their “congrats”)

Here is a convo between Erin and I:


Can I get an amen with our extra jewels on our crowns, ladies?!!!!!!!

But seriously.


Ok. Well. It was in the top 10 for sure.

So, today I marched myself into Walmart because I promised an A-Hole cake and you better believe I’m gonna keep that promise!

Me: I need an Ariel cake to serve 6 people.

Baker Lady: I don’t have anything that small that I can put Ariel on, would you like half a sheet cake?

Me: Sure, why not!

Baker Lady: What do you want written on the cake?

Me: Great Job, Ryder!

Baker Lady: Ummm ok? No happy birthday?

Me: Well, no. Just great job. You see… well…. its a poop party! I told her if she pooped on the potty she could have a party and IT HAPPENED so now I need a poop party cake!

Baker Lady: This is the strangest thing I’ve ever heard. But. Go you for being inventive.


Bless her heart. She didn’t want anything to do with that and I just went and spilled the beans.

I will be posting lots of pictures tonight of the poop party I am sure.

I also ended up having to order a cake to serve 21 people for our poop party if anyone is interested in joining us….. haha!

And don’t judge me.

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

I found a new school for the girls in Cleveland and Ryder can’t go until she is fully potty trained. SO I HAD TO COME UP WITH SOMETHING TO GET THIS DONE.

I bet that poop cake is gonna be GOOD too. HA!

And in case you were wondering since I haven’t been posting much in my moving haze- the girls are just as stinkerish as always.

for example:

I was laying in bed and looked over to find my outlet looking like this…

IMG_2492 Apparently one of them thought the ear buds needed charging too.


for example part 2:

Rory was supposed to be resting in her room. I told her she didn’t have to sleep but she HAD to stay in her bed and rest.

When I went to make up her bed after “rest time” I found this…


First, let us be impressed with my photog skillz. Second, why yes that IS a bag of hot dog buns half eaten in Rory’s bed… why do you ask?!

I asked Rory why there were hot dog buns in her bed and she says, “CAUSE I WAS HUNGRY!” … like DUH MOM GAH.

So the answer is yes. YES. They are still SUCH stinkers.

Don’t tell them this but I totally love it. 😉


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1 thought on “desperate times call for desperate measures.

  1. You make me heehaw laugh! You know what I mean? I mean, laugh until my stomach hurts!!! Sounds like I should have chronicled my life with the twins!!! Have a great time at the poop party! Memories in the making, for sure!

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