hush. don’t scare it away.

Yesterday I took Rory to school as per usual and got home with Ryder. She was in her room playing like she loves to do (because she gets to play ALONE in her imaginary dream world) and I was sitting on the couch watching my usual Gilmore Girls because I CANNOT QUIT.

All of a sudden I hear the pitter patter of feet on the floor. AND THEN A FLUSH.

I sat here in a state of disbelief and WHAT THE HECK DID SHE JUST FLUSH?

I casually walk by and realize she doesn’t have pants on. The following conversation happens:

Me *all cazh/cas* : Whatcha doin’? Did I hear the toilet flush?
Ryder: Yeah. I went potty.
Me: Ohhh ok. Well make sure you —–
Ryder (interrupts): MOM. I will potty in the potty, k? I know how do it. I am a big girl, ‘member?

So for the rest of the day I was literally paralyzed on the couch waiting, listening to what she was doing.

Every so often I would hear that beautiful sound of tiny feet on the bathroom floor and then the sound of GLORY when the toilet would flush.

All.By.Herself.

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She wouldn’t let me talk to her about it or anything. Just GAH MOM I GOT THIS.

I was literally telling myself every time I thought about going to check on her, ‘HUSH GIRL, DON’T SCARE IT AWAY.”

Like I literally said that out loud.

And let me tell y’all something.

I refuse to go back to diapers now.

I see the light.

I will fight until the end.

Or at least I will ignore it until the end and just pray she stays on this path.

She randomly came into the room and said, “I am DONE with diapers.”

So clearly ignoring and pretending I don’t know what is happening is working out really well for me.

I AM THE MASTER POTTY TRAINER.

My book will be out soon.

Titled:

Hush, girl. Don’t scare it away.
From potty training pro, Tifani Harris

Alternate title: How Ignoring My Children For Gilmore Girls on Netflix Helped Me Potty Train

It is sure to be a best seller.

 

*cazh or cas? Obvi short for casual.

but my mouth was open!

Well. I’ve been away.

Har har har.

I don’t even know what is wrong with me.

I literally called Andy this morning and told him I would love to go in a room and just yell for about an hour without stopping and maybe I would feel better.

So basically if any of you are a psychiatrist maybe you should come evaluate me.

Life has just been so crazy the past few weeks.

Actually, let me just say this to The Nester.

Surely if you would have known ahead of time that every season of Gilmore Girls was coming out on Netflix on Oct 1st you would’ve changed this challenge to another month. ???

I’ve watched the show, oh, 230923 times probably.

But never on Netflix which is THE ULTIMATE EXPERIENCE because you can watch it nonstop without having to pause for commercials or change the DVDs out.

Because let’s face it, nothing is worse than having to get up off the couch to change a DVD. It is a total buzz kill.

So basically my life has been taken over by Lorelei and Rory and Luke and Richard and Emily.

Why does this show engross you so much? I mean I literally cannot stop watching this show even though I’ve seen every single episode several times.

The other thing taking over my heart and mind is Mississippi State Football.

Y’all.

I cannot stop smiling, crying, yelling, weeping, hollering, etc over this football season. We fans have waited a long, hard time for this.

This article about my dawgs is a must read- it literally gave me chills and tears.

It also made me immediately go online and find tickets for a game for us to attend this year. I’ll keep you posted on that. You see, I realized that this is the very first season EVER that we haven’t planned to go to a ball game and WE ARE NUMBER ONE IN THE NATION right now and I cannot believe this year we would miss out on seeing our team play. NOPE not happening.

And then there was the epic group message chat of Saturday night.

We were all giddy (we as in Emily and I) over the MS State win and we were just ON A ROLL WITH THE HILARIOUSNESS.

Honestly, we were just having your typical group chat convos when all of a sudden Emily made all of our lives with the following conversation.

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Y’all. I don’t even know how Andy didn’t wake up because he was passed out beside me in the bed when all this was going down. And I literally had the entire bed shaking from laughing. It was amazing.

And Jinny wins the internet for her amazing Meme (or Mèmè as I like to say…) skillz.

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Bless Alexis’ heart she woke up to 468 text messages the next morning. HA.

Honestly I don’t even know how I’m gonna make it through NYC without peeing my pants the entire time. And yet I cannot wait.

The other thing that is getting us all kinds of tickled is the Great Halloween Costume Debate of 2014.

I have a strong desire to have coordinating costumes for the girls. STRONG DESIRE.

And I’m anti-Anna and Elsa because I know every child on earth will be those two.

Rory has been saying she wants to be Sheriff Callie so we have been trying to get Ryder to be the skunk that is on the show.

Apparently Ryder is very sensitive towards other people because she is very afraid that “people be angry I fink” because “people don’t like stinky things”.

When Rory was asked what she wanted to be for Halloween she perked up and said:

“I know! I will be the d*mn cat and Ryder you can be the d*mn dog!”

I would just like to point out that this one thing is actually all Andy’s fault.

Okay, this was a long enough break from Gilmore Girls. I’m knee deep in wanting Jess and Rory to get married…. STILL.

(Side note: Tomorrow is Ryder’s annual cardiologist appointment and we have a few concerns so we would once again appreciate all the prayers we can get for our sweet girl and her beautiful heart.)

Taking care of yourself as a SAHM (some tips). #write31days

I was a stay-at-home mom for 4 years before getting a job last year. I lived in unwashed/undone hair, little to no makeup, and yoga pants on a good day. Most days I stayed in my pajamas stained with crap (literally).

When I got a job I had an excuse to dress nice and put a good face on and dang did I feel good about myself.

Not in a cocky way, I don’t know if I’ll ever feel that good about myself but it just felt so good to get into some clean, fresh clothes and have my hair and makeup done every single day. I felt more alive and felt good in my own skin for the first time in a lot of years.

I say all that to lead to now where I’m a SAHM again.

I decided the very first day of my new but old role that I was going to make sure to get up and get dressed and ready.

I realize it very much so sounds counter productive since, as I’ve said, you literally get crap on you every day.

But you know what? I promise if you decide to, at the very least, wake up, wash your face, and put on some mascara you will feel a million times better. 

So I thought today I would give you a list of some EASY things to put on and still be casual and comfy around the house BUT will make you feel like more than a kleenex to your kids’ snot.

First lets discuss makeup. I find that if I even out my skin with a very light foundation and finish it off with blush and mascara at the least I feel SO MUCH BETTER ALL DAY LONG.

1- My favorite mascara. I have tried every mascara under the sun because I was blessed with great eyelashes but I am always trying to make them even bigger, better, and more luxurious. CoverGirl LashBlast is the best mascara ever and ever and amen. 

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2- I wore Bare Minerals powder foundation for about 10 years and it just wasn’t my favorite anymore for some reason. So then I tried Tarte 12 Hour Amazonian Clay Foundation and absolutely loved it while I worked. But now that I’m at home it was much too thick of a foundation for staying at home.

I tried Bare Minerals bareSkin foundation and it took me a few days and youtube tutorials to realize I was using way too much, but as soon as I did it the right way I fell madly, deeply in love. It is so lightweight and EASY. Make sure you invest in the brush with it because it makes all the difference to me.

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3- Tarte Amazonian Clay 12-Hour Blush. Y’ALL GO GET THIS IMMEDIATELY. It is a little more pricey at $26 but I have had mine that I use every single day for 6 months and it still looks almost untouched. For real. It lasts forever and is the most beautiful blush on earth. Bonus, it actually does last 12 hours. So you can add some color to your cheeks in the morning to look alive and not think twice the entire day if your blush is looking weird and splotchy.

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Clothes- now I know that there is nothing harder than putting on something uncomfortable and trying to clean and play in the floor with your kids. More importantly, all of my friends have real bodies and even the skinniest of friends have different bodies after baby. Especially right after. So here are some options I’m loving right now.

1- LEGGINGS and dresses. I’m not a leggings as pants girl, but I love a good pair of leggings with a very comfy and forgiving dress. I literally live in this sort of outfit now and I never in a million years thought I would. Also, I never iron so something like this would be perfect for me. ha!

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2- Jeggings. I discovered jeggings last year and feel like I can never go back. They are so comfy and stretchy. I can get on the floor with the girls like no big deal in these bad boys.

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I recently bought these at Faded Glory Jeggings at Walmart and don’t ever want to take them off. And they are $13. !!!! (Also they don’t have a zipper- they just slip on but are cute- how could that possibly be?! I’m pretty sure these are the new mom jean. HA.)

3- Flowy tops. Jennifer Garner addressed her “baby bump” this week making her my new best friend even if she never knows it. So should I say more about why I love a flowy top?

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I also love this outfit and the outfits recreated in the source! Maybe I need to start recreating some pinterest outfits!

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So mommas, let me say something loud and clear- IF I CAN DO THIS AND CHALLENGE MYSELF TO GET READY EVERY DAY SO CAN YOU. I feel better than ever and am enjoying being a SAHM again and I know a big part of it is because I’m getting ready and that means I’m taking care of myself first thing in the morning to ensure I feel my best.

And then guess what happens? I treat my whole family better and don’t feel like I’m the least important thing.

It is easy to stay in our pajamas all day and not take care of ourselves. That also means it is easier for us to dip into a vicious “no one cares about me” or “I will always come last” cycle. How do I know? I LIVED IN THAT CYCLE FOR YEARS.

But now I am in control of it thanks to taking care of myself a little every single day, even if that means just mascara. Do you hear me, moms? JUST MASCARA can make all the difference in the world.

Take care of yourself so that you can take care of your family.

So tell me- what do YOU do to make sure you are taking care of yourself every day?

——–

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say and go (because I’m a failure). #write31days

My parents are currently here visiting and I’m treasuring every second with them.

Therefore, I am not writing so much.

Here is what I will say, my girls were so surprised when my parents showed up I thought Ryder was for sure going to faint or sob and Rory was bouncing off the walls in delight. Ryder said, “I didn’t think you could ever make it here.” which caused ALL OF THE TEARS because, PRECIOUS.

1524604_10101350346501846_7983524833416469943_nYesterday we drove around town and I showed them the little I know about Cleveland and then we ate at the most delicious Greek and Italian restaurant. Their pizza was AMAZING and I’ve now marked “favorite place to get pizza” off my list here in town. We went for some fro-yo afterwards and Ryder learned a lesson in stealing.

I don’t think anyone was as shocked as my parents to see the girls sleep all night and sleep IN (Rory 7:30, Ryder after 8).

Today we are going to go to Rock City and the girls cannot wait to take Mimi and Papa there.

I’m pretty sure I’m going to shed some serious tears tomorrow when my parents leave- I don’t think that ever gets easier. I mean, 10 years later and I still become a mess when they leave.

So you can mark me down as a failure for not actually writing every.single.day. but I’ll be too busy enjoying life and my family to care. HA.

 

That is stuck and I know she did not cut her hair. (?) #write31days

Well. I already missed a day. Dangit. But man yesterday was crazy. So I’m giving myself grace on that.

Ironically yesterday’s topic was stuck and obviously I’m supposed to take that and write beautiful words like my friend Cynthia did, but today I’m just gonna tell you the tale of Ryder got a splinter stuck in her foot. And the tale of how Rory cut her hair.

Most importantly I will tell you about one of the best weekends ever.

(I realize these things don’t count but I’m committing to write every day(ish) not to always use to prompts.)

Friday Andy left for a trip to his parents’ house to go hunting. He randomly said to me one day, “why don’t I just take the girls and you can stay home?” and I’m pretty sure I cried because ALONE IN MY HOUSE FOR A WEEKEND?! SERIOUSLY? DOES THIS HAPPEN EVER TO A MOTHER?!

So for the first time since having children I was alone in my own house for a few days and though I couldn’t wait to see them yesterday, it was blissful.

I met up with some girlfriends, shopped, SLEPT, and organized the mess out of my house.

My bathroom and master closet are finally how I want them. FINALLY.

It was pretty much one of the best weekends ever in the history of ever. Especially because MISSISSIPPI STATE BULLDOGS KILLED A&M on Saturday. I mean they flat out smoked them. I watched the game alone while plucking my eyebrows (luxury, people!) and I’m not gonna lie, I totally teared up several times. I get emotional over football.

And though I don’t ever cheer for TSUN I was BESIDE MYSELF with glee when Ole Miss beat Alabama. I even wrote a status that said HAIL STATE AND HOTTY TODDY. It probably won’t ever happen again but dangit I was just so proud of the state of Mississippi.

Not even the roach that crawled across our table at PF Chang’s when Amber and I were trying to have a nice, uneventful meal out would ruin my perfect Saturday.

The girls and Andy got home last night and Rory and Ryder talked NONSTOP FOR HOURS about how much fun they had this weekend. I’m so glad they got to go spend time with grandparents.

Ryder got a nice splinter in her foot while she was there and when he got home it was red and mean and needed to get out of her foot. Everyone tried with no success and we tried all of the concoctions from all of the internets. NOTHING WORKED.

I finally realized I was going to have to just cut it out.

So for a minute I became heartless and cut that sucker out and wouldn’t you know it took two seconds when I finally did that and Ryder was so relieved and so was I.

I may or may not have cried for 30 minutes after finally getting it out. It was TRAUMATIC in all caps.

When it was over Ryder said to me, “Mom you are the superhero!” and let us just say- LIFE. MADE. 

 

This weekend also marked a major milestone for the stinkers- Rory cut her own hair. When I asked her why on earth she did that when she KNOWS NOT TO EVER DO THAT she said, “Mom I just felt like I really needed bangs now.” And she actually did give herself a nice wispy bang.

LORD HAVE MERCY ON ME AND THE TEENAGE YEARS.

So there you have it, two prompts done in one – Ryder’s splinter was stuck and I know Rory did not cut her hair.

Learn. #write31days

I’m sitting here mulling over the word learn. This post could go a thousand different ways.

There are so many things I would love to learn: a foreign language, how to sew, how to “balance it all”, how to make my children obey at least 99% of the time, how to enjoy every moment of life, how to have a successful, happy marriage (not that we don’t but there is always room for improvement and growth), how to train a dragon…. I mean there are MILLIONS OF THINGS I would love to learn.

But most of all?

I want to learn to trust myself. To believe in myself. To let go of insecurities that are like cancer to my dreams.

I want to be a writer BUT : I don’t have the time, I can’t find my niche, I don’t think I will get the support I need, people think I am crazy, I am afraid I will step on people’s toes and hurt their feelings, I am afraid no one will care about what I want to say.

These things run rampant through my head at all times.

Can’t I just learn to let all that go? Can’t I learn to just be myself and be a dreamer and WRITE ALREADY.

I’m always learning. Learning to adapt and to change my life and my goals for my current circumstances.

But I need to learn to not be afraid to go for MY dreams and my God giving gifts in life.

I am 10000% on board with Andy’s dreams and goals. I LOVE to serve him in that way. I can’t tell you how happy this has made me.

But part of me is missing something. Something for me. Some of my dreams are leaving a hole in my heart.

This has been my hardest lesson to learn in life, to just quiet my fears and use my God given gifts well.

 

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#write31days

New. #write31days

Sleep is running low this week (no that isn’t anything new), so I’m going to take the easy way out since my brain is too tired right now.

Next month (!!!!) I’m going to NYC and it has gotten me all kinds of excited but also all kinds of itching for new clothes/shoes/makeup/bags/YOU NAME IT.

Because out of everywhere I have been in my life, NYC is one of my very favorite places in the world and it deserves my best, ya know?

So I’ve been on the search for a few new things for fall and winter and NYC combined.

1- The perfect plaid shirt. I’ve literally been on this search for a month and haven’t found the right one yet.

I am loving this one From Target – can’t get over the patched elbows. This is the #1 contender. It comes in 3 different colors.

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2- The perfect scarf. If I can’t ever find a plaid shirt that fits well and that I like, I’m going to try for a big plaid scarf. Otherwise I want maybe a leopard print and/or aztec print.

Here is a neutral aztec I’m really liking from Forever21.

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I tried this leopard print scarf on at Torrid and it was hard to put down (didn’t have any $ at the time to get it).

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And OH MY GOODNESS LOOK AT HOW PRECIOUS THIS BOW SCARF IS! *runs off to get it immediately*  (from Torrid)

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I’ve had my eye on this scarf at Target for quite sometime.

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3- The perfect tall boot.

Now. Girlfriend (meaning me) has some wide calves. I’ve ALWAYS had wide calves. Always. So I have to look for wide calf boots. And btw- MOST OF MY FRIENDS at ALLLLLLL sizes have wide calves too and have a hard time finding boots. Why don’t people get a clue and design for real people already?! Gah.

I bought these boots at Torrid and I loooooove them. Love. Looooove. They fit SO WELL.

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I would love some black boots as well but they really aren’t in the budget.

4- A gold watch.

I love classic watches like this Michael Kors watch. I wonder if I can convince Andy I need it? Like NEED not want. HA.

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5- Makeup. We all know I’m obsessed with makeup. Here are a few things I think I’m gonna need going into the fall/winter and for NYC.

Naked2 Basics - I didn’t think the first Naked Basics was for me but I’m loving the 2nd one. I have the Naked2 palette and have had it ALMOST TWO YEARS without running out. It is AMAZING. But I’m finally to the point where I’m needing a new palette and the basics are small and great for travel. I don’t need as many as the regular Naked’s so I’m thinking the basics would be the perfect fit.

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I also feel a strong need for a new blush. I’m DYING to try this Ambient Lighting Blush by Hourglass (loving the Ethereal Glow). I’ve heard so many things about it and I need a color better for the cooler months.

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I’m also looking for a great eyeliner- any recommendations welcome!

 

 

What are you looking for this fall? I’d love to know!

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View. #write31days

One of the things I love most about our apartment is the view.

I wake up every morning and think, “I will never tire of this gorgeous view.”

The pictures can’t even do it justice. The mountains are bigger, the sunrise brighter, and the colors more gorgeous.

IMG_1213Every morning I see the sunrise through our windows and it is such a reminder that each day is new and fresh. Each day unique just like each sunrise. Each day His mercies are new- for me, for my marriage, for my children.

But we all know it isn’t that easy. Or, actually it IS that easy, but life gets in the way.

The children act like little demon people, your spouse fails you and you certainly fail them.

You lose your mind between the laundry that just won’t quit and the children that just won’t obey that particularly day (or heck everyday).

And in an instance, it is all snaps out of focus.

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It is all a blur. You can see the beauty in it, but it isn’t as beautiful as you want or expected it to be.

A whole day goes by in a blur of cleaning the same things over and over again, telling your children to please FOR THE LOVE stop fighting with their sibling, and tension with your spouse because life gets in the way of love and friendship sometimes.

It is hard to NOT let every single day be one blur after another blur running together.

Instead we have to fight hard to snap it back into focus.

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Each day I have to learn to let things not bother me so much.

The truth is, I can’t control everyone’s behavior all the time.

I can control my behavior though.

I can’t control the fact that the dishes pile up and goodness the laundry. I can just take one task at a time and get it done when I can.

I can let the mess be beautiful. A sign of LIFE in my house. How sad would a house be without the mess, without signs of life?

In order to keep my view in focus I have to not only give grace to those around me, but also to myself.

—–

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Write 31 days.

Five Minute Prompts.

Read my 31days post here.

 

 

 

 

31 Days of Writing : Move

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I don’t know why I do this to myself because commitment isn’t my thing. Remember how I tried before to do The Nester’s 31 days? Well it worked out for a while and then it just kinda fizzled out. (Search for 31 days in the search bar and you can see my 31 days of letting go series …. which incidentally I let go of around day 20something.)

But I’m itching for a challenge and to write more so I’m hoping this fits the bill and gives me something to look forward to each day.

The best part is- I found a blog that was giving writing prompts and the goal is to just spend 5 minutes on each post. Now this I can handle…. right?!

Go visit Kate and see other Five Minute-ers.

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Move. 

I feel like I have said that word more in my life than anything else sometimes.

Most people don’t quite understand why we move so much. We get a lot of “are you in the military?” questions. No, we are not. We just have been called to many different places in a short amount of time.

In fact, we have been so accustomed to moving that when Andy and I moved here and could actually for the first time in our marriage see ourselves living here forever, I completely panicked.

Staying in the same place from now on????? Seriously?! Crazy talk.

I’ve had a lot of people say that I am brave, adventurous, smart, etc for moving so willingly. But sometimes I don’t feel brave at all.

Sometimes I feel like we are constantly running. I have fleeting thoughts of myself as a coward somehow.

And then sometimes I feel proud that we have seen so much and gotten to know so many people. I have friends from coast to coast.

The most important thing about each move is that they have all made my marriage stronger. We lean on each other more. We appreciate each other more because of the sacrifices we make to better our lives and our family. We are beyond thankful for each promotion, each step up in the right direction toward our goals.

We love each other harder because once you are in a new place, all you have is your family. Andy and I always know with each move that leaving friends is so hard. But the beauty of it is that it makes our friendship even closer and that is the friendship that will always last. 

I’m thankful for every move, even if sometimes I didn’t understand why God would move us then or in those circumstances or in that place. I’m still so thankful for the growth I’ve experienced because of them.

 

time brings laughter.

We all know that I am the very first to awkwardly and loudly laugh at myself whenever something insane happens. If I trip in public I laugh hard and loud and the people who witness it look at me like “IS SHE OKAY?” as in mentally okay, not physically.

So you know I’m having a bad day when it takes an entire week to write about something that, turns out, is HILARIOUS.

A little over a week ago I had to bring Rory to the doctor for her four year check up. Andy was supposed to come to the appointment to help with Ryder or just keep Ryder while Rory and I went but things got crazy at work so I had to go it alone with both girls.

Things were going okay for a while. I was actually kind of impressed with their behavior …

MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

Why do I ever feel satisfied with myself as a parent in a public place?! WHY WHY WHY? It always goes WAY WRONG after that.

The appointment went great, Rory was a champ and was so sweet and cooperative.

Then the time came for the doctor to tell us there were several vaccinations she was due for and this mother was NOT PREPARED. I knew she had to get some before Kindergarten but I didn’t know it would be now.

Bless her little heart, it was horrible. Rory has always been such a champ about taking shots, barely crying or anything.

This time she screamed until I was absolutely sure she was going to pass out. She kept screaming, “I SEE THE SHOTS! I AM FOUR YEARS OLD! I CAN COUNT! THERE ARE FOUR! NO PLEASE NO NO NO NO!” – she screamed all of that over and over. It was probably the worst doctor’s appointment by far for Rory. I could still cry just thinking about it.

During the time Rory was getting shots, Ryder got upset because her “finger won’t work right” on the leap pad and decided since life didn’t revolve around her and her three year old self at the moment she was going to throw a HUGE fit. Such a huge fit that she fell out of her chair and hit her head on the floor.

The nurses were panicking and wanted me to go check on her and I simply said, “oh no, Ryder is just fine. She CHOSE to pitch a fit and there is no blood- she will have to wait. Rory didn’t choose to get shots and she is hurting so I’m going to love on her until she says she is okay.”

And let me tell y’all something- that is probably the best parenting stance I have ever taken. I would do the same thing a million times over.

Threenagers. Sigh. Ryder is clearly going to have to learn the hard way that the world does not revolve around her.

Everything finally settled down and then the nurse gave us a cup for Rory to pee in.

I thought nothing of this because I mean, how easy could this be? I hold the cup, she goes in it, and DONE.

HA.

HAHAHAHAHA. HA. HA HA.

Rory gets in place on the toilet and I hold the cup for her. Just as she is starting to go Ryder walks over, thinks this is hilarious that Rory is going in the cup, and for some STRANGE REASON I WILL NOT EVER UNDERSTAND EVER EVER EVER decides to hit the cup. It happened so quick that I couldn’t even catch it.

Thankfully Rory stopped pretty much immediately so I reach in and grab the cup – both girls are laughing HYSTERICALLY by the way.

I have one leg up in the air blocking Ryder from coming near and I’m reaching for the cup that is now floating in the toilet when it happened…..

Rory shit crapped all over my hand.

Why? I still do not know. But she looks at me horrified and starts apologizing saying “I DIDN’T MEAN TO IT JUST CAME OUT”. I am rendered completely speechless- I didn’t want to cry and for once in my life I just couldn’t laugh yet (which is probably why Rory looked so scared, bless her heart). I just remained calm and silent though there were ALL THE WORDS in my head.

So now I have been peed and pooped on in a .3 second span of time and I think to myself:

THIS IS MOTHERHOOD. Getting shiiii crapped on is now the norm for my life.

HANG IT UP TIFFANY, THIS IS THE END.

Now imagine, if you will and are still reading, me like this- one leg up in the air blocking Ryder, one hand reaching over to wash the crap off of it, and one hand holding the cup firmly in place to FINALLY FINISH THE JOB WE CAME IN HERE TO DO.

We come out of the bathroom looking like ….

mom

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But trying to look all put together like my normal self…

10270475_10101333670555576_8769586678345417667_nHA HA HA HAHAHAHA.

The poor nurse is wide eyed and probably really curious as to what went on in that bathroom because the Lord only knows what it must’ve sounded like from the outside.

I’ve replayed it several times wondering if I said the ‘s’ word out loud in front of my children (and the nurse innocently waiting for the specimen outside) and FOR THE LIFE OF ME I cannot remember.

So I’m going to pretend I didn’t because that makes me feel a tiny bit better.

As we walked out, I tried not to hang my head in shame but apparently it didn’t work because the doctor stopped us and asked if we wanted a sucker. Then he patted me on my back and said, “Mom, I think you need one too.”

It took everything in me not to say, “Mister, I need this sucker to be fermented and made of whiskey to even touch making me feel better,” but decided it probably wasn’t wise.

So there you have it. The story it took a little bit for me to laugh over and now I can’t stop laughing over it.

 

 

 

*sorry mom for saying the Davis word on the internets. 

**I’m also sorry for talking about whiskey- I really don’t drink it I promise. I prefer not to have hair on my chest thankyouverymuch.